Saturday, 19 September 2009

An Interview With Jasper

I sat in Jasper’s chair behind his desk, doodling dirty pictures on my notepad. My skirt was perfectly pressed and my hair elegant and neat, the picture of prim and proper. Jasper enters, humming lightly to himself when he spots me in place behind his desk and he stops, that naughty grin pulling up the corners of his mouth.

“Are we role playing?” he asks, laughing.

It’s true, I rarely dress like I actually own proper clothes for an office environment, but I was channeling my inner reporter today.

VAJWET: Mr. Cullen, we have an interview to do today.

Jasper: Will this interview include various demonstrations of you bent over my desk?

VAJWET: Only if you answer questions like a good boy.

Jasper: Well you know me and my southernly gentleman manners.

Jasper then moves around his desk, helps me to my feet and sits in his chair, pulling me back to sit in his lap.

VAJWET: Now, Jasper, you are Head of Technology, correct? Could you tell us a little about your job?

Jasper: That I am. I work mainly on the programming of the bots, mostly within the lab. My partner, Xander, works in the offices on the above floors as he runs the mainframe, but I get to do the….um, hands on work.

VAJWET: For those who can’t see you…can you clarify that wink you just gave me now?

Jasper: That means I work very closely with the team member who knows these computer systems backwards and forwards, and my hands on work consists of my hands on her ass, more often than not.

VAJWET: Just so we’re clear, Jasper is giving me a demonstration of this now, although I get that demonstration everyday, I am the team member who knows these computer systems backwards and forwards, after all. Moving on….I have a question from Apple, she wishes to know where you find your inner zen? She believes you are very even tempered.

Jasper: Well, I run when I’m feeling stressed and I jerk off to a lot of porn. Emmett has got quite the collection going. I think combined we could start a minor empire. And for the record, I don’t watch low quality youporn porn. I appreciate the effort people make but there’s something to be said for direction and proper lighting.

VAJWET: *coughs* So…there you have it…porn stress relief.

Jasper: Don’t pretend you didn’t enjoy watching some with me last night…

VAJWET: Moving on….Apple also wants to know what you’re packing, I suspect she may secretly want a go around with a bot version of you….Edward has been rather prudish.

Jasper: Well, you tell me.

VAJWET: Jasper is now thrusting his length against me. Considering I am sitting on his lap…it’s very distracting. But it’s quite sizeable ladies….quite sizable. Magnum size…and then some.

Jasper: That’s what she said.

VAJWET: Unggghhh…….*coughs* Ummm…Right…So, we have some more questions for you…

Jasper: Shoot, my dear, I’d much rather get through them…I have other activities in mind…involving riding crops….

VAJWET is temporarily indisposed while dry humping the interviewee and making good use of his perfect lips. The interviewer breaks away and straightens her hair which has mysteriously been released from its perfect bun. Jasper grins innocently.

VAJWET: Yes, questions, Vicky wishes to know why it took you so long to go after your woman?

Jasper: Ahhh yes, I had a feeling that one was coming. Well, my girl is gorgeous and very aggressive, going after whatever she wants. I figured if there was some interest there…she would make the first move. And I do like a girl into dominance.

VAJWET: You are making it very hard to stay on track.

Jasper: I’d say I’m sorry but I’d be lying.

VAJWET: Anyways, Vix also wants to know what you really think of the bots? And what you thought of Jess fucking one that looked just like you.

Jasper: Well, the bots are ingenious, to be sure. The amount of time and energy we’ve put into them to turn them into a marketable product is quite inspiring. However, having Jess fuck one that looked just like me over fucking the REAL me….well….I can’t say I was happy about that.

VAJWET: Jealous, are we?

Jasper: Not anymore…that tight ass is mine whenever I want it now.

VAJWET: I think you have that backwards.

Jasper: Aren’t we working on your control issues, darlin’?

VAJWET: *huffs* Fine….speaking of, your southern charm, please tell us where this came from as your brothers don’t have a drop of it.

Jasper: I went to a private school and college in Texas while my brothers went up north. I learned quite a lot and picked up small things here and there.

VAJWET: Why is it that you went to a different school from Edward and Emmett?

Jasper: Just personal choice, Carlisle has always indulged us in whatever we wanted.

VAJWET: So, tell us a bit about your brothers and father.

Jasper: Hmm, Edward, I’m not sure what happened to him, Emmett and I tried to teach him properly but he somehow ended up as the biggest prude on the face of this earth. Although, I think he steals mine and Em’s porn when he thinks we don’t notice…I don’t even want to know what he does with them. He’s recently been rather depressing with his whole “I can’t be without Apple and why is she fucking this piece of machinery senseless” routine.

Emmett is pretty easy going. I swear you’d never know he had 2 PhD’s if you met him in a casual setting because he’s just a man of the people, but extremely smart. He’s also, thank god, pretty fun to be around as we’re basically into the same kinds of things.

Carlisle, well, he’s certainly changed a lot since mother died. I swear he used to blush at the word penis before and now he’d whip it out with no problem whatsoever. This whole project coming from him shocked us all to say the least, but it’s certainly been quite the experience.

VAJWET: You mentioned your mother, which brings us to our last question from Vicky: What do you think of your new mummy?

Jasper: *laughs* What, are they getting married now?

VAJWET: It’s probably just a matter of time, although I personally like living in fornication.

Jasper: *laughs again* Me too…speaking of, the maid called, she’s not sure what the bar hanging down from the ceiling is for.

VAJWET: Well, she wouldn’t…. “The Position” is confidential and copyrighted.

Jasper: As well it should be….you know no one but me can pull that off and get you to cum four times in a row…

VAJWET: Jesus….

Jasper: Are there any more questions?

VAJWET: I uh…umm….I….why?

Jasper: Because we’re not going to have time for them….

VAJWET was unable to finish the interview as it is very hard to write when bent over her boss’ desk and getting slammed into from behind….

Perhaps next time they should send Jess to interview another member of the team who can’t distract her so well….

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